Truth about Jesus
This revelation has come as a shock to even me! However, our Lord of Hosts is never wrong, therefore I must report some sad news. This is the commandment that will change our world forever:
I the Lord of Abraham even the Lord of Isaac sayeth unto thee, Jesus is no Longer my son. I sent my x-son down upon the eartheth to spread my Gospel. However, of Late, Jesus of Nazerene has been misleading people. I now only command the leaders of the my people to lead our flock into paradise. Verily, he who surfeth the snow shall gain eternity...he who skates it shall perish. I say these things unto all the tribes of the world.
Well, if this doesn't surprise me! the first part talks about how Jesus is no longer god's son...therefore we shall no longer claim to be christians. Instead we are now to follow our own path and we the Prophets will lead all our faithful. Also, snowboarders will go to heaven and skiers shall burn in level 13 outerdarkness.
So remember, the only people that deserve eternal damnation are those who will not join us. We have the right to judge, because we are the only true church today.